Dear Reader,
Thankfully today was a much better day. I definitely took that beta blocker! It only took me an hour to wake up after my alarm rang, so that's a bit better. I tracked my time all day today in a notebook so that I could stay aware of it. I think that helped a lot, but I still didn't get as much done as I had hoped. I think that, since I don't have a sense of time, I always think I should be able to get more done than is possible, and that leads to a lot of frustration.
But, I'm very happy to tell you that I got my bedside table cleaned out today, and the little table beside it, and all the things that had built up on the floor around it! This is a project I have been working on for an embarrassing long time! My bedside table has three deep drawers and I've been slowly cleaning them out one at a time as kind of a small side project. I had a bunch of books that had piled up, too, so I got those put away except for two that I'm going to keep trying to finish.
I planned on doing Pommodoro today, but I got too caught up in my bedside table to change tasks. Have you heard about Pommodoros? It is a way of scheduling your time. You work on one and only one task for twenty minutes, using a timer. When the timer goes off, you MUST stop working for 5-10 minutes. Then you move on to a different task or continue with the one at hand for another twenty minutes. I love doing this It's called The Pomodoro Technique. While you're working, you make a jot on a paper for every interruption you have during that time, and a different sort of jot for every time you interrupt yourself, like to check your phone or talk to someone. You don't get to stop or pause your timer, though, for any reason! It still ticks off the twenty minutes and you have to stop when the timer goes off. It makes you very aware of time and teaches you to use it more efficiently. It also creates an awareness of how often you are interrupted by other people so you can take steps to end that. And it also causes you to take note of how much time you waste when you should be working, For me, it reminds me that time is passing whether I am aware of it or not. If I want to use time wisely, then I have to become more aware of it. If you want to learn more about this, the website is www.http://pomodorotechnique.com.
I ran into a problem this morning while working on my bedside table was that my timer on my iPhone didn't go off. I have been thinking that I had been sleeping through my timer, but not so! It's just not going off. I turned it on to figure out what was happening, and somehow it had gotten on to a setting where it does not signal at all. Neither by sound OR vibration. I didn't even know there was such a setting! I didn't become aware that something was amiss until 56 minutes had gone by. So, by that time there didn't seem to be any point in changing tasks, so I just kept working on this project until it was completed. Tomorrow I hope to spend most of the day in cleaning up and clearing out one of my studies. Since I have two, I'll call this one "the white study". It is an ENORMOUS mess!
I didn't try to workout today. I got up and got dressed nicely and did my makeup and hair, read my Bible and had a prayer time ... and did a lot more research on World War I. I have a theory that the world we live in today has been massively affected by this conflict and has never fully recovered. I think a lot of the ills we deal with have their roots in this terrible war. Did you know that more than 44 MILLION people worldwide had been killed, wounded, or were missing at the end of the war! And this figure is not including the number of civilians that were wounded or missing, only those that were killed. And then the Spanish flu wiped out millions more after the war was over. It was first recorded in March of 1918 and the war ended eight months later in November. This figure also does not include the soldiers who died of their wounds after returning home, nor the thousands of suicides in Britain alone, or the tens of thousands who went insane and had to be put in mental institutions. And it doesn't show the lives that were ruined because amputations made them unable to work, so they had to become beggars. And Kaiser Wilhelm of Germany was apparently stark crazy. At one time he made his generals dance a ballet before him wearing tutus and feathers! One of the generals dropped dead of a heart attack while doing it.
I have to give a talk Tuesday to a large group about the history of the home in which we live, and especially a scenic wallpaper in it. This is with the reception I planned yesterday. I always do more research each time before I give a talk about it, so I probably will spend some time going over all the material I have already found and see if I can find more information. For instance, I know the man who built the house, how much he spent, where he fought during the Civil War, what regiment he was in, etc. But I don't know when he died or where he's buried. I'd like to see if I can find that out. I presume he is probably buried locally.
So, tomorrow is Saturday. Our son usually comes down on Saturday or Sunday to visit, so I hope to get to see him this weekend. Our daughter told me last night that she suddenly realized that we are moving in three months! I asked her how she felt about that and she said it was okay, it just was strange. I told her I really wanted to move and live in New York, but I didn't want to move away from her. She said breezily that things have to change! Well ... if she doesn't get a job or an internship within these three months, she WILL be moving with us! Her daddy isn't going to pay for an apartment if she's not working by then! I am not stressed out about this move now, like I was for so long. I still have a strong feeling that this move is the right thing and that every thing is going to work out.
So, I didn't exercise today, but I did do work on the house that was necessary to be able to move. I didn't wake up on time, but it only took an hour for me to wake up. I ate okay. I had oatmeal with blueberries and walnuts for a late breakfast. During the afternoon I could tell my blood sugar was dropping, but I just did NOT want to EAT! It's like I'm just tired of eating! I knew I was going to have to, though, so I had four corn tortillas with watercress, turkey lunch meat, and cilantro rolled up. They were delicious! Once I started eating I was really hungry!
My husband thinks I need to increase my antidepressant dosage because of the fatigue and not big able to get anything much done or wake up. We'll see, but first I want to find out if I have parathyroid tumors. If I do and they are removed and I still don't feel better after a while, I'll look into that.
So, I had a moderately good day today. I hope you had at least as good a day yourself. This whole trying to not be angry at myself and be kind to myself is hard. I could feel it rising up when I told you I had four corn tortillas. I should have only had two or three! I'm a terrible person! Aaargh!! But, I was able to not fall into that trap. We'll see what tomorrow brings.
Boy, if I could get that study finished ... well, that is not possible, but if I could even just get the DESK cleared off that would be amazing!! I'm going to need to buy another bookcase. I have two and they are completely full and overflowing. I hope I can still find them so I can get another one. I'm going to have to inventory all of those books, which is not a fun thought!
Well, I'm actually kind of looking forward to tomorrow. I do have to go to the grocery store in addition to working in the study, and make dinner at some point ... but maybe I can get plenty of work done. I feel lighter with each thing I give away! I'm never going to be a minimalist, but neither am I a hoarder!
Ok, well that's it for now.
Cheers!
Lisa
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