Dear Reader,
well, I might as well admit it. The system has chugged it's way back to a grinding stop. But, I'm going to put a positive spin on this. Usually, when I start exercising again, I injure myself. But I have not injured myself. I'm still very washed out, but am not horribly fatigued. The main symptoms, if this was a virus, are over, so I'm likely on my way to getting better and hopefully will feel fine when we leave for New York Tuesday. I also have not had a major crash-and-burn experience from the dysautonomia like I usually do when I start exercising. That usually throws me off for three or four days, but I don't think that's what is going on here. Right now I think I've had a mild virus; there are plenty of them going around. So I am not going to let myself be discouraged. This is just part of my general poor health: I have come down with a virus. I'll let my body recover and keep moving.
I gave in and ate cheese last night! I tried, again, to go to sleep without a Xanax; despite the fact that it didn't work earlier in the week and despite the fact that I decided NOT to try to do this anymore! So, while I'm at it, let me tell myself loud and clear one more time: I will not try to go to sleep without Xanax again until sometime after we have moved!
I finally did take one, and then decided I was a little hungry and didn't want to eat the banana I brought upstairs. So I tried some potato chips, hoping the salt would stop the desire for cheese. Didn't work! So I heated up three corn tortillas and put refried beans on them with jalapeños and hoped that would do the trick, but it didn't. So I finally took out a knife and hacked a chunk of cheese off that wheel and ate it standing right there. It was delicious!! I cut off another piece and ate it, then I cut off some more and melted it on a corn tortilla. What a thing of beauty! I put a bunch of jalapeños on it and rolled it up and ate it. Delicious! So, that was enough cheese for me, and I went back to bed and was able to go to sleep. I hadn't had cheese for about nine months, so I had no antibodies in my blood and got away with eating it without a reaction. I'm thankful for that! No more cheese for me again, now.
I didn't let me myself sleep real late, even though I decided not to go to church. So I've had roughly seven hours of sleep which, while I'm still very tired, should be enough to get me through the day.
I found a good wakeup guided meditation. I think the last time I said this, I gave the wrong website. So many of the people doing this have really unpleasant voices! I tried a different one this morning, but she was reading a script and put a period at the end of almost every word! Then I tried another one, but it was a little too Buddhist for me. So I went back to one I listened to before, and really liked it. She sounds Indian and speaks with a lovely voice. She emphasizes that this is a new day and is a gift to be appreciated and to be thankful for, and that it is another day to decide who you want to be, and to try to live it as your best self. If you want to try it, it is at http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WYP_W49o1vQ
Well, I wrote a lot more earlier today about, you know, other "stuff", but lost it somehow or other. I'm sure it was all very important and losing it is a devastating loss to humanity! :-)
I've been looking for more floor exercises and have come across some good sites. One is called, "Get Fit, Not Injured: Fitness for All-- the Fit, the Fat, and the Fallen!" Isn't that perfect? I just revised my exercise routine and included many of the exercises I have found. It turns into about a 45-minutes workout, and I feel like I got all of my muscles very well. I also found a sit about the one hundred moves of pillars that looks interesting.
Tomorrow I get to call the dentist and apologize profusely for missing my appointment and set another one. I also need to call the cardiologist to get an appointment set with her. And call my local doctor to find out if my blood calcium levels are still high and get an appointment with an endocrinologist. If I need surgery, I want to have it ASAP since I will apparently start feeling a lot better. I also have to get a manicure so my nails will look okay to meet the Board of Directors.
Oh, I should explain something. I've shared about how I'm trying to help my housekeeper present herself better. I realized that some may take offense at me teaching her how to apply a natural-face makeup. The reason I did that is because I'm trying to teach her about consistency. Sometimes she comes in with her hair cute and some makeup on and in a happy mood and raring to get at the house. Other times she looks like she just barely rolled out of bed, has no energy, and gets almost nothing done. She slumps, let's her hair fall in her face, and, in general, acts like a morose teenager. So I talked to her about finding one look that she can maintain consistently, every day. I also advised her to find a cheerful attitude that she can exhibit every day. My point with her is that she has to present herself as a competent professional each and every day, not just when she's in a good mood. There is so much I have to tach her before I leave! She doesn't take notice of thngs. Last week I left a dirty cup with a spoon on it on a small desk in the hallway, and she never noticed it. After four days, I brought it to her attention, and she was astonished that she had not noticed it. In my son's room there are dead bugs all over the floor by an A/C window unit. I don't think she is even going into his room. I have had much better housekeepers in the past; but she has by far the best personality and is the easiest to be around.
My clothes for New York have not gotten in. I've tried tracking them, but it just says the information is not available. I'm going to need to pick out clothes from my closet for the trip. The only problem is that I have no idea what I will be doing. I have a perfect black dress, pumps, purse, and jewelry if we have an evening dinner. But I don't really have anything if I need to look professional. I bought a pretty tweed suit in December, but I worry how it will look with these additional pounds. I'm not even sure if the skirt will fit! I have a nice, casual outfit I can use looking at houses during the day with a realtor, so that should be ok. Maybe the package will get in tomorrow, though!
I've been wanting to get back to juicing, so I picked up some fresh vegetables today at the store. Tomorrow I plan on making the parsnip, green pepper, and watercress juice. Ugh! If I weren't a big believer in fresh juices (I used to juice all the time) I wouldn't do it.
Well, I'm off to bed. I hope to live tomorrow as my best self, but that's soooo hard! I'd much rather live it as my whiney, complaining, stalling, and wasting time self! That would be so much easier!
Cheers!
Lisa
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